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The Other Side Of Getting Out Of Debt: The Wealth Gap

December 1, 2018 By Omar

Getting out of debt is hard. It forces you to face a past that has probably caused you some pain. As if that isn’t bad enough, you have to own your part in causing that pain. On top of all that you have to change the habits that got you there in the first place and never go back to them! It’s no wonder that so many people that start the debt free journey fail to complete it.

This is why finding your “why” is so important. At some point, you have to get so disgusted with your situation that you’ve got the emotional fuel to change who you are. If you feel your fuel running low I’m hoping I can help. Stick with it! I promise you it’s worth it.

If you’re in the process of getting out of debt I want to give you an idea of what life looks like on the other side. Before I do that though I want to explain a concept that is so simple yet so hard to do.

Living Below Your Means

If you’ve ever read or heard anything about personal finance you’ve heard this. It’s practically the golden rule. If you can’t live below your means you can’t win with finances. What does it actually mean though?

All this means is that there needs to be a gap between how much you earn versus how much you spend. That gap is where you build wealth. This is referred to by some people as the wealth gap. I know this is really simple but sometimes we tend to complicate this financial thing.

Sometimes we try to get so analytical when really we just need to KISS (Keep It Simple Stupid).

Do me a quick favor. Think about how much money you bring in per month. Now think about how much of your money is going out in debt payments (including your mortgage or rent). Think about how much of your money is going out in waste because you aren’t being efficient with your income (i.e. you aren’t doing a budget). That represents what your wealth gap could be!

Now let’s get to the fun stuff!

The Power of The Gap

I was looking back at some budgets from 2012 and realized we make roughly the same amount of money now that we did back then. We had just gotten married in July of that year and moved into a decent but cheap apartment in the area we wanted to buy a home in. Our big goal was to pay off some debt and to save up for a down payment for a home within a year. At that time we were able to save about 33% of our take-home pay. This was our wealth gap!

Here is what we were able to accomplish with our wealth gap and with the power of budgeting over the past 6 years:

  • Paid off Kim’s car and paid off her student loans.
  • Saved up an emergency fund (about $12k) and a down payment for our home (about $12k).
  • Saved up for our official honeymoon to Aruba (about $4K – I HIGHLY recommend Aruba by the way).

We ended up closing on our house in late June of 2013 then flying to Aruba six days later. Talk about being on cloud nine!

Since moving into our home in 2013 we’ve been able to do the following:

  • Install hardwood floors on the main floor and top floor.
  • Update the upstairs bathroom.
  • Bought a new (used) SUV with cash.
  • Update our Kitchen.
  • Overhaul our Deck.
  • Get the interior of our home painted.
  • Put new flooring and paint in our Laundry room.
  • Install a new HVAC for the main floor.
  • Install a new HVAC for our upper floor.

We’ve been able to do the above and continue to visit Destin, FL for vacations because Kim has to go to the beach every year (Lol). On top of that, we’ve continued to invest a nice chunk per month in our 401Ks and IRAs as well.

We planned to update our master bathroom and had saved up the money twice but found better uses for the money both times. The first time was covering Kim’s maternity leave and insurance deductible. The second time we felt it was better to increase our emergency fund again.

  • read: Don’t Call It A Comeback

Please keep in mind that we have not borrowed money to do these things. When you have control of your wealth gap you can focus it on whatever you want to accomplish and knock it out insanely fast.

Over this 6-7 year span, we’ve also had two children (one of which was born this past summer). I was able to increase my income through new employment over the years which allowed Kim to go from working full-time in 2012, to part-time in winter 2015 when she returned from maternity leave the first time, to PRN in late summer 2015. Now that Kim is PRN she’s only required to sign up for 3 shifts in a 6 week period. This has allowed us to spend more time with our two sons as they grow up. Not to mention avoiding a hefty daycare bill. Most of all, it’s been an increase in the quality of our life.

Final Thoughts

OK. I’m going to wrap this up because I actually feel a little dirty because I don’t want this to come off as a humble brag. There isn’t anything special about Kim and I. We don’t make huge sums of money. We’ve just mastered our wealth gap and use it to accomplish our goals. Once you eliminate your debt and free up your gap you can do the same. So stay the course. The grass is really greener on this side!

Kim’s Thoughts: I just want to reiterate that while there’s a list of things that we’ve accomplished over this time, the first list was using our wealth gap to essentially get out of debt and assure that we stay out of debt. The second list was using our wealth gap to do some things we wanted to do and needed to do. Neither of these lists was completed in a short amount of time. As you can see, it took us YEARS. And that’s OK. We had to run our race as fast as our income would allow. And you have to do the same – Run your own race.

Do you know what your wealth gap is? Are you using your wealth gap to the best of your ability?

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Filed Under: Personal + Finance Tagged With: debt, debt free, life tips, wealth gap

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Why did I quit?
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The TL; DR version is: It was a compromise between Omar and I when it came to having another baby. Some people might feel a way about this, but at the end of the day, our marriage  of 10 years and relationship of almost 20 years has survived off of lots of communication, compromise, and comprehension. This is how we have managed to do everything we’ve set out to do. And this phase of life is no different.
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If you want the full version of the story, you can check out my stories. 😉
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Some of the pics and excitement from our gender re Some of the pics and excitement from our gender reveal. Needless to say, this was an exciting moment to share with our boys and parents. 💖
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(#piecesofsomeday #thislifeafterdebt #babynumber3 #partyof5 #budgetbuster)
It’s a… gender reveal!! 🖤💙💖🖤

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(#piecesofsomeday #thislifeafterdebt #babynumber3 #partyof5 #budgetbuster 😆)
As of 1/8/2022, it’s been one year since we beca As of 1/8/2022, it’s been one year since we became mortgage free. What better way to celebrate than a date night in our paid off home?! 😏
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So how does it feel?
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Financially, we invested the most money we've ever invested. We also increased our lifestyle a bit as well to keep a healthy balance.
 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Kim’s Perspective: 
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It’s been great. For the longest it felt surreal and unbelievable that we actually did it. I never really worried about paying off the mortgage because I knew that worst case scenario, it would be paid off in 15 years, which would’ve been when we were 45 (and that’s not a bad age at all). However, it’s been nice to know that it’s not something that Omar is stressing over anymore. And since it was one of his biggest dreams/goals, it’s nice knowing that I was able to support him 100% of the way in making this happen for us and our family. I’m glad this is something he wanted to pursue and that I was actually on board with it. What I’ve enjoyed most about it is being able to spend more money (of course 😆) because a lot of things were put on hold while we focused on the payoff. So now I feel like I’m at that point where I can make our house more of a home for us. It literally feels like we’re in a new space (mentally and physically) and we’re loving it.
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Omar’s Perspective:
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This past year has probably been the best year I've had in life. I've been the least stressed I've ever been, but took on the most responsibility at work I've ever taken on which lead to a promotion and an increase in income. This boggles my mind as more responsibility at work usually means more stress. I feel like I’ve been able to focus on other areas of my life more (my health/weight as well as making more of an effort to maintain my relationships with friends/family). Most importantly, I realize the strength of my marriage.  With the state of dating/relationships these days, I realize I won the lottery with Kim.  She's an amazing wife and mother. We've always had a good relationship but we're stronger than ever.  We started from the bottom now we're here (in my Drake voice). 🎶 #thislifeafterdebt
After taking some time to think about what we want After taking some time to think about what we wanted to focus on for this year, we decided that our word for the year is health.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Overall we both want to continue making healthier choices when it comes to eating. And we both want to focus on exercising more than we have in the past and be way more consistent with it.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
At the end of the day, what’s money, financial freedom/independence and wealth if you’re not healthy? And we definitely have high blood pressure, diabetes, etc that run in our families. We have kids to live for and that’s what we plan to do to the best of our ability!
This is what our financial goals ended up looking This is what our financial goals ended up looking like for this year. We’re pretty pleased with the outcome and the fact that we still enjoyed ourselves throughout the year and even made some pretty big purchases (like that whole couch saga I shared in my stories 😆). We’re looking forward to seeing what the next year holds! #thislifeafterdebt
We didn’t officially choose a word for 2021, but We didn’t officially choose a word for 2021, but if we had to say a word that was our word for this year it would be “intentional” by far.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
At the end of 2020 and beginning of 2021 we were very intentional about pulling money from an inherited IRA so that our tax bill wouldn’t be ridiculous like it would have been if we pulled a lump sum at one time. We then used the money to help pay off our mortgage 8 days into 2021.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
What we were even more  intentional about was our plan for what we were going to do with our mortgage payment once we didn’t have a mortgage anymore. We didn’t want to frivolously spend that money. So we actually came up with our plan a couple months before making our final payment. But literally after that payment on January 8, 2020, our new mortgage-free budget was in full effect! So yea, “intentional” is definitely a good word to sum up 2021 for us. #thislifeafterdebt
Some of the things we automate are:
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Our Budget:
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
For the longest we use to type everything we were going to spend or save into our budget template. It wasn’t super time consuming but it wasn’t efficient when it came to our regular bills/expenses. Then one day we decided to prefill the template and copy and paste it month to month for our regular bills/expenses. All we have to do is add anything else we spend.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Savings / Investing:
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Most of our savings/investing and even our gas and spending money our automated transfers. It beats having to go in and make multiple transfers to our personal accounts and our sinking funds. The 529 accounts for the kids and the Roth IRAs are automatically transferred. But for the brokerage account we have to manually transfer the money because it’s never the same amount each paycheck.
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Bill Pay:
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I’ve never been a fan of bill pay because I don’t like companies having that type of access to my money. 🥴 And whenever they mess up and charge you too much, they’ll try to just credit your account instead of putting the money back in your bank account. 🙄 However, I’m a tad bit more trusting these days. Lol. Our home alarm had no option but to be auto drafted. Since the amount wasn’t much and is always the same price, I agreed. And the only other bill auto drafted is our cell phone bill after many many years (gasp! haha). Some of the other bills are paid via online bill pay via our banking account. #thisfinancialconfession
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Comments

  1. Neda says

    December 1, 2018 at 8:23 am

    Great blog! I enjoyed the living below your income. I may attempt this. This is a killer for my need for instant gratification. I’m glad that you guys returned to blogging. I hope that I am continue to follow and learn from y’all. I need to find the blow money method and discuss if we can implement that concept😃 have a great day!

    • Omar says

      December 1, 2018 at 9:45 am

      Living below your means is definitely worth it. The easiest way to do it is with the budget so you can watch the dollars coming in nd going out. We’re glad to be back. Blow money is Kim’s area of expertise (😂). I’ll theow in my two cents too if you want it though.

    • Kim says

      December 1, 2018 at 4:01 pm

      It’s good to be back! I’ll get straight to the point since Omar called me out. Lol. This is the post that talks about blow money (https://thinkingofsomeday.com/budget-categories-things-you-cant-leave-out/). I feel that blow money helps with instant gratification to some degree because you can spend your blow money on whatever you like as long as you have some. So sometimes I try to save mine if it’s going to cost more than what we allot for blow money. I suck at saving it though. Lol.

  2. Katrice says

    December 1, 2018 at 6:30 pm

    Nice blog guys!!! I would have to talk with my hubby on what our wealth gap is. We were aware of living below our means. I believe we could do a little better in category in my personal opinion. I am definitely the saver and sacrifice person in our relationship lol (in personal opinion lol). Starting at the first of the year, we did share with you guys that my husband is going to re-evaluate our budget and actually stick to the budget. We keep you guys posted on how that goes.

    • Omar says

      December 2, 2018 at 6:39 pm

      Let us know for sure Katrice! Knowing What your gap is important but managing it well and growing it is even more important. If you can maintain or decrease your spending and increase your income you’ll make that gap bigger. That’s when things get really fun.

  3. Yvonne says

    December 4, 2018 at 4:49 pm

    Great blog guys..valuable. concept…wish I knew all these things during my working years. It could have make my retirement ‘bucket’ much bigger….believe it or not, we are trying to keep within our social security using the budget….very doable since we do not have a mortgage. We enjoy reading.

    • Omar says

      December 5, 2018 at 2:48 pm

      Thanks for reading! The good thing is that you can probably make it just off social security. If you think about it that means the income you decide to pull of your nest egg(or let continue to grow) represents your nest egg. That’s a beautiful place to be!

  4. Kris says

    December 4, 2018 at 6:13 pm

    Once I got out of my student loan debt, my savings rate increased a whole lot and with a contributing factor of living below our means that meant bigger wealth gap. Right now we could practically travel anywhere or buy a nice car fully-paid without the stress of car payments with interest. We have the freedom do that if we want because of the nice wealth gap we built.

    • Omar says

      December 5, 2018 at 2:58 pm

      Exactly Kris! Exactly. The bigger that wealth gap is the more freedom you have to make certain choices. Also, it makes you more resilient to the negative events that can decrease your income like loss of job and disability. Sure, your gap might shrink some in those cases but it won’t make you sink.

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See what’s happening on Instagram

thinkingofsomeday

I quit my job at the end of April and it’s been I quit my job at the end of April and it’s been great so far.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Why did I quit?
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
The TL; DR version is: It was a compromise between Omar and I when it came to having another baby. Some people might feel a way about this, but at the end of the day, our marriage  of 10 years and relationship of almost 20 years has survived off of lots of communication, compromise, and comprehension. This is how we have managed to do everything we’ve set out to do. And this phase of life is no different.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
If you want the full version of the story, you can check out my stories. 😉
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
#piecesofsomeday #thislifeafterdebt
Some of the pics and excitement from our gender re Some of the pics and excitement from our gender reveal. Needless to say, this was an exciting moment to share with our boys and parents. 💖
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
(#piecesofsomeday #thislifeafterdebt #babynumber3 #partyof5 #budgetbuster)
It’s a… gender reveal!! 🖤💙💖🖤

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
(#piecesofsomeday #thislifeafterdebt #babynumber3 #partyof5 #budgetbuster)
🖤 🖤 + 🖤
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
(#piecesofsomeday #thislifeafterdebt #babynumber3 #partyof5 #budgetbuster 😆)
As of 1/8/2022, it’s been one year since we beca As of 1/8/2022, it’s been one year since we became mortgage free. What better way to celebrate than a date night in our paid off home?! 😏
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
So how does it feel?
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Financially, we invested the most money we've ever invested. We also increased our lifestyle a bit as well to keep a healthy balance.
 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Kim’s Perspective: 
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
It’s been great. For the longest it felt surreal and unbelievable that we actually did it. I never really worried about paying off the mortgage because I knew that worst case scenario, it would be paid off in 15 years, which would’ve been when we were 45 (and that’s not a bad age at all). However, it’s been nice to know that it’s not something that Omar is stressing over anymore. And since it was one of his biggest dreams/goals, it’s nice knowing that I was able to support him 100% of the way in making this happen for us and our family. I’m glad this is something he wanted to pursue and that I was actually on board with it. What I’ve enjoyed most about it is being able to spend more money (of course 😆) because a lot of things were put on hold while we focused on the payoff. So now I feel like I’m at that point where I can make our house more of a home for us. It literally feels like we’re in a new space (mentally and physically) and we’re loving it.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Omar’s Perspective:
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
This past year has probably been the best year I've had in life. I've been the least stressed I've ever been, but took on the most responsibility at work I've ever taken on which lead to a promotion and an increase in income. This boggles my mind as more responsibility at work usually means more stress. I feel like I’ve been able to focus on other areas of my life more (my health/weight as well as making more of an effort to maintain my relationships with friends/family). Most importantly, I realize the strength of my marriage.  With the state of dating/relationships these days, I realize I won the lottery with Kim.  She's an amazing wife and mother. We've always had a good relationship but we're stronger than ever.  We started from the bottom now we're here (in my Drake voice). 🎶 #thislifeafterdebt
After taking some time to think about what we want After taking some time to think about what we wanted to focus on for this year, we decided that our word for the year is health.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Overall we both want to continue making healthier choices when it comes to eating. And we both want to focus on exercising more than we have in the past and be way more consistent with it.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
At the end of the day, what’s money, financial freedom/independence and wealth if you’re not healthy? And we definitely have high blood pressure, diabetes, etc that run in our families. We have kids to live for and that’s what we plan to do to the best of our ability!
This is what our financial goals ended up looking This is what our financial goals ended up looking like for this year. We’re pretty pleased with the outcome and the fact that we still enjoyed ourselves throughout the year and even made some pretty big purchases (like that whole couch saga I shared in my stories 😆). We’re looking forward to seeing what the next year holds! #thislifeafterdebt
We didn’t officially choose a word for 2021, but We didn’t officially choose a word for 2021, but if we had to say a word that was our word for this year it would be “intentional” by far.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
At the end of 2020 and beginning of 2021 we were very intentional about pulling money from an inherited IRA so that our tax bill wouldn’t be ridiculous like it would have been if we pulled a lump sum at one time. We then used the money to help pay off our mortgage 8 days into 2021.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
What we were even more  intentional about was our plan for what we were going to do with our mortgage payment once we didn’t have a mortgage anymore. We didn’t want to frivolously spend that money. So we actually came up with our plan a couple months before making our final payment. But literally after that payment on January 8, 2020, our new mortgage-free budget was in full effect! So yea, “intentional” is definitely a good word to sum up 2021 for us. #thislifeafterdebt
Some of the things we automate are:
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Our Budget:
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
For the longest we use to type everything we were going to spend or save into our budget template. It wasn’t super time consuming but it wasn’t efficient when it came to our regular bills/expenses. Then one day we decided to prefill the template and copy and paste it month to month for our regular bills/expenses. All we have to do is add anything else we spend.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Savings / Investing:
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Most of our savings/investing and even our gas and spending money our automated transfers. It beats having to go in and make multiple transfers to our personal accounts and our sinking funds. The 529 accounts for the kids and the Roth IRAs are automatically transferred. But for the brokerage account we have to manually transfer the money because it’s never the same amount each paycheck.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Bill Pay:
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I’ve never been a fan of bill pay because I don’t like companies having that type of access to my money. 🥴 And whenever they mess up and charge you too much, they’ll try to just credit your account instead of putting the money back in your bank account. 🙄 However, I’m a tad bit more trusting these days. Lol. Our home alarm had no option but to be auto drafted. Since the amount wasn’t much and is always the same price, I agreed. And the only other bill auto drafted is our cell phone bill after many many years (gasp! haha). Some of the other bills are paid via online bill pay via our banking account. #thisfinancialconfession
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Doing all of this has been a game changer and time saver. Are you team automate or team manual?
Follow Us

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